• I never imagined i would ever have balls to publicly blab anything about her.Not Caroline.Caroline is a monarch.An empress.A potentate.She belongs in that rare clique of individuals who speculate that relationship should be an entirely confidential affair.I respect that.

    Hell,I hate it when people refer to her as Carol.Carol doesn’t sound like a woman who crosses her legs till her husband returns from his miserable hustles.By the way,do Carol know how to cook?What?Tea?Whenever someone mentions Carol,a figure of a tall damsel with crooked wig and green lipstick smudged on her fleshy lips pops in my mind almost instantly.

    Caroline is my diary.


    I bought her from discovery bookshop-in Meru,with no slight idea of what i would write.Impulse buying?No.I was complying to one of those shitty doctor’s advice after being diagnosed with ulcers.I had to quit alcohol and the only way to make it a success was ensuring i didn’t have a single idle coin in my pocket over the weekends.

    The two years we have shared the same roof might have been terrible to her.From the first day i picked her from the bookshop,the same day we got rained on,making her spend the next day on the iron roof.Sunbathing.

    But she has never complained.Not a single day i have confronted her with a pen for some nookie and be disappointed.Never complained of headache or any bullshit as an excuse to prevent me from my conjugal rights.Never complained of my miraa chewing habit whenever i asked for a kiss.Ooh my Caroline,a woman who wakes up in the middle of the night to polish her nails.A woman who wakes up in the odd hours of the night to straighten her night dress.

    Have you ever witnessed the kind of a relationship where a woman never talk?A relationship where a man does all the talking while a woman sit her ass and listen?Does it even exist?In which planet?Earth?..That is how my Caroline behaves.She is always there to listen but not talking.Like a statue,I pours my sentiments to a woman who never respond.

    Being an introvert i have been having a lot to write about;anything.Sometimes the barking dogs would displace my sleep in the wee hours of the night,half-asleep glance at the Caroline proudly sitting on the stool beside my bed,stretch my hand lazily and tap her sexy,pages and before a short time we are in another romantic world.

    I go against Caroline odds and i share our secrets in this blog.I still don’t know what pushed me to do so!Maybe it has something to do with her current looks.The two years have corroded her beauty beyond my expectations.The wrinkles on her face (read as cover) are so intense that no makeup can fool anyone of her age.Not even the colored newspaper my niece tried to cover her up with the other day can restore how i used to see her.

    I am not going to fold my hands and watch her vanish from my life.I am not going to let her disappear with everything we have been sharing for two years and pretend nothing has gone wrong.Yeah,I am going to share with you everything and even if you don’t give a f**k about it i am glad this will act as a platform to store words between lovers.Somewhere i will stop years to come,long after she has gone and remind myself of the happy times.Somewhere i will rush to console my heart whenever i weep her departure.

    And for those who might be tempted to touch her privates,i will kill the jealous part of me and allow you.Though you will have to bring along your own pen,not mine!No man will allow you to cheat with his own wife and go ahead buying a packet of condom for you.And for my dear readers,subscribe and share the blog with your friends.It is the only way we are going to grow bigger.Not that its will change anything about you but it wont break your heart.will it?





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